Recently, I made a week long trek back to Lancaster, PA to visit friends and play golf with my PA golfing buddies. The trip included three hosts (one in Pinehurst, NC, one in White Horse, PA and one in Lancaster, PA), three visits to my favorite ethnic club (the Liederkranz), three visits to my favorite sports bar (Stubby’s) and two visits to my favorite neighborhood watering hole (Valentino’s, this number would have been inflated however they were closed for the three day holiday weekend), along with six rounds of golf at some of PA’s finest tracks, including three crack of dawn (5:45 am) rounds at the Highlands of Donegal.
As they say, all good things must come to an end, so on Tuesday morning at 8:30 (after completing eight holes of golf due to a torrential rain storm), I began my journey back to FL, not before carefully loading our home address into my MAPS App and pressing the green GO button. My estimated travel time was 18 hours with an arrival time of 2:30 am.
The drive from PA to FL is a familiar one, having traveled back and forth on countless occasions over the past thirty years. The tricky part is deciding whether to travel down route 95, tackling the DC metropolitan area (rolling the dice on heavy traffic versus the shortest distance) or an easier, yet longer path down route 81, eventually connecting to route 77, then connecting with route 95 or staying on route 81 connecting to route 75.
Based on my 8:30 am departure time, I elected to head down route 95 towards DC, hoping the mid-day window would expedite my journey.
Traffic was tolerable as I negotiated the DC area. Once past DC, my trusty MAPS App suggested a faster alternate route, eventually connecting with route 81, which is a stunning daytime drive. I thought the alternate route was a bit odd but assumed there might have been issues between DC and Richmond.
My MAPS App kept me on route 81(even past the route 77 exit towards Charlotte), traveling through Knoxville connecting with route 75.
Just past Knoxville, my MAPS App, once again, suggested a quicker alternative, exiting onto route 59 which I cheerfully embraced.
Some twelve hours into my trip, I was on autopilot, listening to my beloved Ray’s, taking in all the sights. Heading southwest, I was convinced route 59 was going to eventually start tracking southeast towards my desired destination however the predominant direction remained southwest. Eventually, I pulled over to take an enlarged view of the map on my MAPS App.
As I expanded my MAPS App, my driving flight path had me heading straight for my street and number in Houma, LA (that’s right, Louisiana), not Homosassa, FL! Well, needless to say, that was quite a surprise and an emotionally challenging moment in time. After a long, deep sigh, I once again carefully loaded our address into the MAPS App, which showed nine more hours of travel, with a 6:00 am arrival time as compared to the original 2:30 am arrival time.
After connecting with my wife, who was empathetic (there might have been a few snickers under her empathetic tone) and listening to her request to embrace Tom Bodett (“I’m Tom Bodett for Motel 6, we’ll leave the light on for you”), I spun things around and headed southeast.
The trip was a bit painful however without much traffic the hours began to click off. I decided to keep going, simply wanting to get home as soon as possible to see my spouse.
At 6:05 am I pulled into my driveway, hit the garage door remote, entered the house, gave my wife a big kiss and a hug, and casually glanced over her should to see a box with a Club Champion logo, which was delivered the previous day.
Some might say my decision to pull a driving all-nighter had something to do with the arrival of my new Callaway Apex irons and my new Ping G 410 driver/Ping G 410 three-wood however I will never admit to such nonsense.
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The back nine can only get better!
It was great to see you and enjoy a round of golf during your trip to Lancaster. Thank you for sharing the details, sorry meant to say hilarious details, of your drive home.
I am surprised you did not unpack the clubs and head to the range right away. You must be slowing down.
Gave it serious consideration but decided sleep was critical so I could get a pure experience!
Was great having you back in Lancaster. Sorry to hear of your extended trip home. At least you had something to look forward to when you arrived. No, not the clubs silly.
Sorry you did not stop by. The bloody marys are getting old waiting for you!